Apr 18, 2014

Meet Lupert

Have I introduced you all to Lupert? Lupert and I have a hate-hate relationship.

+ shows up unannounced at least once a year.
+ He always inconveniences me, he usually shows up when I’m extremely stressed.
+ He embarrasses me in front of my friends, family and co-worker.
+ My appearance is never good enough for him, he always wants me to wear something specially fitted to him.

I hate Lupert. I’m sure all of you are thinking that Lupert sounds like a terrible person, why would I want him in my life? Well Lupert is not a person.

Lupert is a cold sore, pictured below lathered in Abreva.

He made an appearance when I had a mental breakdown on Tuesday. He showed up and still hasn’t left. I’m pretty much living on abreva and L-lysine right now and talking with my hand in front of my mouth to try and hide the hideousness that is Lupert. All of you that get cold sores, lets start a support group?

Are you one of the inflicted?

Apr 17, 2014

Drinking Bad Kool-Aid

Wow. I feel like I’ve been drinking some bad kool aid, because my last 2 posts (here and here) were pretty grim. Surprise, surprise, I guess that is life, sometimes it’s up and sometimes it’s down - really down. The good news it that I’m starting to feel like I can cope with everything going on in my life. I’m starting to feel more powerful than my emotions and that is a really magnificent feeling. Last night Jared and I had a long overdue date night. All our free time has been spent working at the Sandy House or visiting my family.  Yesterday, Jared knew I was feeling blue and so he e-vited me on a date, which totally lifted my spirits. We went out to dinner, just the two of us, with no puppy dogs and then came home and laid in bed. We really wanted to watch all the shows we were behind on, but since it was already late, we had to pick only pick one, Game of Thrones.. which by the way… WHAT THE EFF! I have no idea how last Sunday’s episode wasn’t spoiled for me via twitter/facebook, because it was intense!

As I was falling asleep I felt relieved. Instead of thinking about all the negative things going on right now. I started to think of some positive things coming up with the quick approaching summer.

+ I cannot wait to go on our road trip from San Francisco to Oregon. It's less than a month away and it's going to be the best summer kick off! You can read more about it, here.

+ Camping. I love when it’s warm enough to camp. Utah is such an outdoorsy place, that within an hour from my home there are hundreds of camping places and a few lakes. The best feeling is spontaneously packing up on Friday night and getting out of the house to go camping.

+ Sleeping by the pool on Sunday mornings. We have a pool in our town house complex and Sunday mornings it usually empty. I love waking up around 9am, grabbing our big comfy lounge chairs and finishing my snooze out in the sun by the pool.

+ Summer nights, one of the worst side effects of Winter is that it starts getting dark so early. I love that in the summer, the sun doesn’t start to set until 8:30-9. It’s refreshing to have light so late. I don’t know how they do it in Alaska, when it’s dark for days at a time.

+ Short term excitement, I bought this hair detangler on Amazon and I’m really excited for my next hair wash, so I can try it out.

What are you excited for this summer?

Apr 16, 2014

One Step At A Time

Yesterday was a rough day in Miki land. I woke up feeling pretty sick and decided my body and  brain do so much for me that I owed them a break. Luckily I now have a really cool job, really cool boss, really cool co-workers and I was able to work from home. Since I figure most of yesterday was a panic attack, I just wanted to be home. I was able to work from my laptop for a few hours spastically throughout the day and then really give myself a break that I desperately needed. I wanted to give a shout out to all of you that commented, posted, and emailed me. Those kind words always go really far with me.

Of course, I’m not feeling 100% refreshed, but I do feel like yesterday boosted me enough to get by. Which at this point, is all I need. Don’t get me wrong here, I’m not suicidal. I’m not in a severe depression. I’m just coping. I’m coping with a lot. I’m not sure how to handle it and I think that I’ve overworked myself trying to figure that out. When in reality all I can do is take it one step at a time. That’s not such a bad thing. I think dealing with 1 thing at a time is helping me cope much better than trying to see the overall big picture and getting extremely overwhelmed.

Today I woke up and thought, okay, time to get ready for work. That’s all I need to think about. When I finished that I was able to get myself to work and concentrate on one task at a time to get me through the day. Tonight when I get home, I’ll do that same and hopefully that will help me put things into perspective.

What is your go- to when you’re overwhelmed?
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